his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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