i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?