peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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