and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Randomize
