Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Do vagina's smell?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Hippo gnu deer
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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