Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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