It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Just cropdusted the office
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
