You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
