That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
