There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
