I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
