dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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