I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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