Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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