If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
