You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize