u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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