just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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