If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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