Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
