I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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