i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
nutella sex= disaster
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
