i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
