using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
