We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
