I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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