did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize