I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Randomize
