I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
