Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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