If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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