I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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