i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
