stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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