no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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