We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
