He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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