don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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