i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
