Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
