we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swung at the pinata with crutches
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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