I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
