Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(937): View more from Ohio

We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.

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(937): We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now. http://tfl.nu/61xt

Replies (32) Good night (3135) Bad night (789)
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(913): View more from Kansas

My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me

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(913): My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me http://tfl.nu/wgqk

Replies (9) Good night (1761) Bad night (912)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.

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(612): I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school. http://tfl.nu/cnqq

Replies (88) Good night (1122) Bad night (11324)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?

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(252): after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went? http://tfl.nu/cg2w

Replies (30) Good night (1602) Bad night (4954)
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(419): View more from Ohio

Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away

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(419): Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away http://tfl.nu/g1qo

Replies (19) Good night (5521) Bad night (1004)
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(303): View more from Colorado

that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall

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(303): that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall http://tfl.nu/ckaq

Replies (25) Good night (5636) Bad night (1038)
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(845): View more from New York

You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.

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(845): You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you. http://tfl.nu/t7go

Replies (21) Good night (4860) Bad night (1274)
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(785): View more from Kansas

Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else

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(785): Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else http://tfl.nu/imin

Replies (8) Good night (2778) Bad night (1202)
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(217): View more from Illinois

If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?

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(217): If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping? http://tfl.nu/vdup

Replies (5) Good night (2177) Bad night (690)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina

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(610): Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina http://tfl.nu/hqzz

Replies (19) Good night (2180) Bad night (1062)
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(813): View more from Florida

obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.

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(813): obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary. http://tfl.nu/eqex

Replies (0) Good night (708) Bad night (1425)
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(806): View more from Texas

It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.

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(806): It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there. http://tfl.nu/4q4i

Replies (8) Good night (508) Bad night (1452)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.

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(920): I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset. http://tfl.nu/b5mu

Replies (3) Good night (657) Bad night (682)
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(845): View more from New York

I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.

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(845): I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again. http://tfl.nu/qswf

Replies (3) Good night (338) Bad night (572)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours

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(303): Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours http://tfl.nu/pdaj

Replies (0) Good night (566) Bad night (319)

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