I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
