i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
so let's talk penis.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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