I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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