we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
