no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
