laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.