My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize