I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize